After talking
about the Premier League for a while, it’s time to cross over from England to
the rest of Europe, where we’ll be taking a look at the events that unfolded in
the best competition on the continent, the UEFA Champions League. Ever since
the competition went from group stages to a league phase, things have been very
chaotic. 36 teams, of which 8 go directly to the Round of 16, while those from
9th to 24th have to play in the play-offs to see who
advances and who goes out. 25th to 36th go home, lmao. On
one hand, it’s a bit easier to not write a whole lot about the games,
statistics, chances of advancing, etc., but on the other, waiting to write a
report at the end of the first month of the New Year is very painful. Which is
why, starting from the next season, the regular bi-weekly reports on the
competition will return.
Something that I
do want to get off my chest firstly is to say that 2026 has had quite a wild
start. Politics ruining shit for everyone, destroying any possibilities of
having peace for even 5 minutes, people wanting to go at each other. Sadly,
these things even invade the Beautiful Game, where we gather to watch a sport
to calm our minds from the depressing state that is life. Secondly, I was
extremely lazy to even begin writing this report. I’m not in the holiday mood,
although the festivities were amazing. I was just lazy to write anything. Even
a game review that I’m working on, it’s collecting dust at the moment. But
worry not. Next month is where I pull up my big boy pants and get to work.
On 27.01.2026, in which it was supposed to be a trip
to France to support PAOK play against Lyon in the Europa League, 7 fans
tragically lost their lives in Romania, after their minibus crashed into an
oncoming truck. One of the survivors say that malfunctions within the minibus
were the cause for the incident. Rest In Peace, Δικέφαλοι Αετοί (Dikéfaloi
Aetoí).
Before we do start the quick report, quick ground rules. The report will be divided into 3 sections:
- The Losers
- The Undecided
- The Winners
With that being
said, HERE WE GO!!!
THE LOSERS
Quite a lot of
teams here need no mention as to why they are here. They made it to the
Champions League, which that in itself is a massive achievement. But the game
here is way, WAY different than it is back home. So exiting the competition was
inevitable for these teams. Except for five. Those are: Ajax, PSV Villarreal,
Napoli and Pafos.
Ajax is a team
with rich history and plenty of success in the Champions League. The team which
produced the father of modern day football, Johan Cruyff, currently is sitting
3rd in the Eredivisie, fighting for a spot for next season’s
Champions League. But this shouldn’t come as a surprise, as the team has been
having quite a lot of downs and not so many ups in the last few years. They
were fighting for survival almost 3 years ago, after a manager change and squad
rebuilding took place. With only 2 wins out of 8 (this applies for the 4 of the
5 teams I mentioned), they really couldn’t do much to keep up with the rest of
the pack. Poor overall play, quite unlucky in the defence department, lack of
creativity, and overall shitty presence has caused Ajax, Villarreal and Napoli
to suck major ass.
The less said about PSV, the better. Imagine
dominating the Eredivisie, and still getting knocked out from the Champions
League’s league phase.
Villarreal is,
if not, an even bigger loser than Ajax and Napoli, WITH NO WINS UNDER THEIR
BELT, except a glorious draw against Juventus, which isn’t saying much. How are
these guys 4th in LaLiga?
Napoli is quite
tragic. They’re playing quite the football at the moment, with Scott McTominay
becoming a Napoli legend. The team decided to quit the Champions League on
October 25th, after getting their famous pizza thrashed with
pineapples by PSV Eidhoven, and then going down a man after Lucca was shown red
in the 76th minute for having too much skill issue in pizza making.
Also I do find it funny how Napoli ruined their whole game with that own goal
from Buongiorno.
The team that
undeniably SHOULD’VE MADE IT IN THE QUALIFYING ROUND WAS PAFOS! The Cyprus
team, for how “small” they were compared to the rest of the, they put up the
best fight out of everyone in the “Elimination” places. Aside from getting
destroyed by Bayern 5-1, they were on track to qualify for the later stage, but
due to sharing the points with teams above them (teams from 27th to
23rd place all had 9 points) and ESPECIALLY their awful goal
difference with the rest, they sadly packed their bags and left the
competition. Nevertheless, they made history and could’ve gone even further,
but fate is a cruel mistress. Same goes for the Kazakh side, Kairat Almaty.
They were very awful, so this is their only mention in this report.
THE UNDECIDED
Just going to
quickly give shoutout to Qarabağ and FK Bodø/Glimt. These two teams shattered
expectations and outschooled a few of the teams participating in the
competition. Well done lads.
But this section
of the report can only be described with only 3 words: THE SPECIAL ONE!
Of all the teams
in this section, Benfica and Real Madrid were the most notorious. Mostly
because of their performances, AND THEIR CLASH IN THE FINAL GAME OF THE LEAGUE
PHASE.
Benfica were on
the defensive side throughout the whole match. Although Real had the better
possession, the holes in their attack and defence, and overreliance on Kylian
Mbappe to carry them to victory had cost them dearly. His goal in the 30th
minute was quickly forgotten with an equaliser in the 36th minute,
with a goal from A. Schjelderup. To make matters worse, at the end of the first
half, Benfica were awarded a penalty, after Tchouameni tried to do some dirty
defending. Pavlidis made Benfica’s comeback become reality with his goal scored
as cool as a cucumber.
Real’s troubles
continued as Schjelderup scored for 3-1 in the 54th minute. Around
this time, Real had completely given up and wanted to do nothing but wait for
the referee to blow the whistle for full time and go home. Mbappe scored his
second 4 minutes later, but that didn’t hype up Los Blancos at all to fight for
a win.
After a bit of
unfortunate (or in this case, typical Real) mishaps, Asencio and Rodrygo got
sent off in stoppage time. Mourhino, who manages Benfica, decided to troll the
ever loving shit of Real in the last moments of the game. His troll involved
him telling his GK to support the players during a long ranged free kick, which
was caused by Bellingham in the 98th minute. Guess who scored the last goal of the match?
In the end,
Benfica saved themselves from getting eliminated with this win, by finishing 24th,
angering many Marseille fans in the process… AND REAL WENT FROM 3RD
TO 9TH, MEANING THEY HAVE TO PLAY THE PLAY-OFFS IF THEY WANT TO
CONTINUE!!! This is why we love the Beautiful Game.
THE WINNERS
The only comments I have for this short section of the report are:
- Sporting CF
making it to 7th, which is pretty cool
- Spurs and Man City being here. They have been going through a bad run for a while now, and they’re here. Actually, scratch that. ADD THE ENGLISH TEAMS IN HERE BECAUSE OF THEIR GOD AWFUL FORM AT HOME AND HERE. GGs to Arsenal for keeping a perfect score, though.
Short, but
straight to the point. The Benfica and Real Madrid match was the biggest
highlight of the league phase, and how could it not be? Your own GK to score
the winning goal, which was THE FINAL TOUCH of said match is something that
only happens in the world of video games, films or animation.
Bellow, we have
the confirmed matches for the Play-Offs:
I will put a bit
of February in my January Monthly report of the Premier League, since some good
matches are happening this weekend. As a whole, quite an exciting League Phase.
Looking forward to what’s to come.
Until next time,
Ѓорѓи „GioGio“ Илиев
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