Many teams start to take a competition
seriously once the group stages are over and advance to the Round of 16, where
they have two chances to win and advance with the tournament. Same goes for the
fans, where they start to get anxious and excited for the matches that are
about to be played. I, however, am not that kind of person that sees this part
of the UEFA Champions League (or the other European tournaments) as something
big or serious. I just see it as an extension of the group stage, or a warm-up for
the Quarter-Finals, where the real deal happens. Only time I ever got worried
for a Round of 16 was back in 2013, when United unfairly lost to Real Madrid.
Fuck that ref that gave Nani a red.
Well then, let’s jump straight into the
recap of Round of 16…
BAYERN vs. LAZIO (3-1)
First Leg: 1-0 for Lazio
Second Leg: 3-0 for Bayern
Let’s be fair, did Lazio even have a
chance at beating Bayern? Well… Sort of.
If Upamecano didn’t receive red in the
67th minute, and Immobile missed his penalty in the 69th
minute, the match would’ve ended even.
Thankfully, Kane and Muller reminded
everyone who Bayern Munich are and how they can dominate their enemy.
A one-sided match up in general. Even
with Bayern slacking this season, they were still able to dominate the Italian
side with ease.
REAL SOCIEDAD vs. PSG
(1-4)
First Leg: 2-0 for PSG
Second Leg: 1-2 for PSG
Same like the previous game. Real
Sociedad faced the Kings of the French Farmers, PSG, and the CEO of the
Farmer’s Union, Mbappé.
That lad carried PSG in both games. With
the only exception being Bradely Barcola, who scored in the first leg of the
game in the 70th minute.
Mikel Merino’s goal in the 89th
minute of the second leg was a pity goal at best.
Safe to say, Sociedad got hammered hard…
REAL MADRID vs. LEIPZIG
(2-1)
First Leg: 0-1 for Real Madrid
Second Leg: 1-1
I was going to start off like the
previous games, but Leipzig gave Real a run for their money.
In both legs, Leipzig held their own
against “Los Blancos”, defending well and attacking well. But well just won’t
cut it against them.
Brahim Diaz scored the only goal in the
first leg, whilst Vinicius Junior in the second. Leipzig’s Willi Orban
equalised in said leg, and gave hope for his side to rise up against the
challenge and perhaps score a second so they can drag out Madrid to Extra time,
or even knock them out.
But reality is often disappointing.
Better luck next time lads. Try Pepsi, it
is way better than Red Bull…
MAN CITY vs. COPENHAGEN
(6-2)
 |
First Leg: 1-3 for City
Second Leg: 3-1 for City
Do I really need to explain how they
won? I’d rather talk about how EVERYONE WANTS CITY TO GET KNOCKED OUT OF THE
CHAMPIONS LEAGUE! Just like how everyone wants them to not win the Prem back
home…
ARSENAL vs. PORTO (1-1;
Arsenal win on penalties 4-2)
First Leg: 1-0 for Porto
Second Leg: 1-0 for Arsenal
This match would be considered an
exception to the rule I made when introducing this report, but given how SHIT
both legs were, I’m not going to bother with the praises for this draw.
In the first leg, Porto’s Galeno scored
in stoppage time in the last minute, in the last second of the game.
For the second leg, Arsenal’s Trossard
scored in the 41st minute.
In both legs, the matches were slow and
boring as shit. The penalties were even duller. After Porto’s first miss of the
shootout, it was sort of the end for their Champions League run.
Arsenal are off to the Quarter-Finals
after that horrible display.
BARCELONA
vs. NAPOLI (4-2)
First Leg: 1-1
Second Leg: 3-1 for Barcelona
Promising your players with
money as a reward for beating Barcelona isn’t really motivating.
Napoli’s disappointing run
of the 2023-2024 season continues, as they failed to beat former giants
Barcelona.
Osimhen and Lewandowski
scored in the first leg for their clubs, where as in the second, Fermin,
Cancelo and Lewandowski scored for Barcelona, and Rrahmani’s single goal for
Napoli wasn’t enough. Italian teams this season are kinda mid, not going to
lie…
PSV vs.
DORTMUND (1-3)
First Leg: 1-1
Second Leg: 2-0 for Dortmund
All I can say for this one
is: VAR NEEDS TO BE REMOVED!!!
During the second leg,
Dortumnd had a free kick in the 77th minute. It was taken well by
Reus and Füllkrug ran towards the ball to put it in the net, BUT BECAUSE HIS
SHOULDER WAS 2 INCHES OUTSIDE OF THE ALLOWED AREA, IT WAS DISALLOWED!!!
All in all in both legs,
both PSV and Dortmund played well…
INTER vs.
ATLETICO (2-2, Atletico won 3-2 on penalties)
First Leg: 1-0 for Inter
Second Leg: 2-1 for Atletico
This game was sort of epic
until the penalty shootout…
Arnautovic scored the only
goal for Inter during the first leg, whereas Griezmann and Depay for Atletico
and Dimarco for Inter in the second.
Then half the teams missed
their penalties and then Lautaro Martinez fucked things up for Inter, giving
Atletico Madrid the opportunity to advance in the Quarters…
CONFIRMED
TEAMS FOR THE QUARTER FINALS:
-
ARSENAL
-
ATLETICO MADRID
-
BARCELONA
-
BAYERN MUNCHEN
-
BORUSIA DORTMUND
-
MANCHESTER CITY
-
PSG
-
REAL MADRID
I would post highlights of
the games, but blame UEFA for not allowing people to check them out…
This wraps up my quick and
not so professional report of UEFA Champion’s League Round of 16 report. It was
pretty disappointing to say the least. And the teams that advanced are not that
fun to watch in all honesty. But that’s life for ya.
Imagine Arsenal winning the Champions League. That’d be mental…
ENTERING
DOOM
Ѓорѓи „GioGio“ Илиев
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