Friday, 29 April 2022

PREMIER LEAGUE MATCHWEEK 34 REPORT

 








Arsenal vs Manchester United

FUCK! FUCK! SHIT!!!  FUCK! SHIT! SHIT!!!



As if losing to Liverpool wasn't bad enough, our bad luck continued against North London's "Gunners".

I am not even gonna go into too much detail about the game. Arsenal had the defense and the attack, and Manchester United had the fuck all and the shit goat. 

Arsenal violated United's privates in both halves, but Xhaka ejaculated a fine, big one and Arsenal came at the end with a 3-1 win.

To add up on this match, at the time of writing this, we drew against Chelsea. 1-1. A rather shit game that one and this one against Arsenal. Nothing much to add...

Arsenal fans having an orgasm whilst watching their team forcing themselves on mine...




Liverpool vs Everton

Jurgen Klopp'd "The Toffees" at The Kop



Merseyside Derby. A classy match between another teams that bear the colors of Red and Blue. And just like the Manchester teams, they aren't that far off in their city.

However, their success is.

Klopp had an enjoyable time beating the ever loving shit out of Everton and Premier League legend, Frank Lampard. 

Everton, a team that might end up in The Championship, couldn't do anything against their tyrannical Red opponents. Liverpool on the other hand, was testing the waters in the first half. To see what tactic can be used to destroy their victim.

Second half began and Robertson and Origi ended the game. A 2-0 win for Liverpool, and a nice training session for their Champions League game against Villarreal (which they won).

Frankie's time at Everton might be at an end. Will he remain as their manager? Or will he get sacked in the morning?

AND CAN LIVERPOOL STOP BEING GOOD FOR 5 MINUTES?!?!?!?

Everton received some spanking and Liverpool became- Actually, it was never Blue...




Brighton vs Southampton 

Didn't see this one coming, did you?



 As I was looking which games I should pick, I got annoyed with some where the big teames played, and the rest were either 0-0 or 1-0. So I went with this one. A good game I have chosen.

Both Brighton and Southampton are in the bottom half of the league, and they are very close with their positions. Brighton is 11th, and Southampton is 13th.

Same can be said for their performance this season. Mediocre. At least it's better than Everton's and United's.

Danny smashed one in the 2nd minute of the game, followed by an own goal in the 44th minute by Southampton's Mohammed Salisu. Prowse scored 2 goals to equalize the result.

On top of the goals, Brighton were the more dominant team, with their pressure game plan being a good success, albeit they fell into quite obvious offside traps.

Nevertheless, a decent game that brought with it some charm that can only be found in English football...

My boys at Sport Klub didn't have any highlights, so I had to take the ones from the official Youtube channel of Brighton. Meaning you'll have to click on the " Watch on Youtube" thingy to see them...




Standings






Final words about this matchweek:
None. But expect a big post from me during the weekend. 




Until next time
Lord Slayer




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