PREMIER LEAGUE MATCHWEEK 13 REPORT

Arsenal vs Newcastle United

A worthy result for a side belonging to the top 5...

How far we've come. From being harassed by everyone, to harassing everyone back. Arsenal have truly risen from the dead and are now on a quest to deliver punishment to those that are rift of deserving it.

Newcastle is one of its victims. Despite the team now being extremely rich, that doesn't mean anything at all. Just look at the result.

Arsenal on the other hand, have done an incredible job for themselves with this one. Saka and Martinelli gifted Arsenal the win, and their goals were scored within 10 minute difference. But let's not give all the credit to the goal machines here, as they couldn't have done it without the assists of their buddies, Tavares and Tomiyasu respectively...

Arsenal are moving mad at the moment. There's no stopping this weapon of destruction at the moment...

Liverpool vs Southampton

Nothing new over here. Liverpool bullied another club to death...

Can these guys just stop? Like, just once, I'd like it if Liverpool stopped beating up random teams because they think it's all fun and games. Because at this point, seeing Liverpool bullying teams, big or small, is freaking scary.

What's even worse is that their victim was basically the team they bought out not too long ago, Southampton. Oh! Wait! It's Southampton? Then it's alright. They get sodomized by pretty much everyone, so it's all good. But then again, Liverpool did weaken them when they bought 60% of the squad a few years back.
MEANWHILE, "The Anfield boys" must have been starving for goals and points and wins to score and obtain. As if their wins in the Champions League aren't enough. Jota and Thiago had it in the bag all the way in the first half, when the team was having a laugh and fun leading with 3-0, and then van Dijk made the fun bigger and Southampton's suffering much worse when he joined the party.

"The Saints" are at this point not just martyrs, but victims of rape and things that are much worse to write about...

How to bully innocents 101...

Leicester City vs Watford

GOALS EVERYWHERE SON!!! EVERYWHERE!!!

A unique game in it's own right. Probably the most action we've seen this week of the "Prem". A wonderful performance by both sides with goals all over the place, Leicester vs Watford is perhaps my own personal game of the week.

Both teams are somewhat in form I suppose, with Leicester being 10th, and Watford regaining placements to avoid the bottom 3. And their clash during matchweek 13 proved to be fantastic, and gave fans of football a delightful game. 

But it wasn't all rainbows and sunshine in the end, as the 3 points were given to Leicester and its heroes: Maddison, Vardy and the superhero Lookman (seriously, what the fuck is that last name. Just like Drinkwater). On Watford's side, we have King and Dennis that were able to slightly give chase to Leicester. But in the end, they were unable to catch them and force them to either share, or somehow obtain the 3 points...

Oh yeah, it was also snowing. The reason why Spurs vs Burnley was postponed...

Manchester City vs West Ham United

Yeah, City just bore me for some reason...

Not even kidding with that statement. They bore the crap out of me. 

Very tame football in comparison to the others. Not even the small quantity of goals scored is enough to write a long yet short report on it. 

To sum it up, Gundogan scores, then he assists Fernandinho, and then West Ham score, with not much hope for a draw. 

Both sides have a comfortable place on the table though, so that's a plus...

I forget that it was very snowy in England yesterday...

Chelsea vs Manchester United

FUCK THIS GAME!!!

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Standings

No final words this time I'm afraid. United's shite game against Chelsea killed the mood.
HOWEVER! It's all just for today, so don't worry about it.

Until next time
Lord Slayer...